again...

again..
last minute tell me he going out with friends...
i cant imagine if i have already left my house.
forget it ba..
i should have get used to all this earlier.
but i cant stop myself from feeling disappointed.

just a few days ago..
he said if i don't wanna go MOS..
then he also don't go then will accompany me.
now..
ended up he said he will go out with his friends.
what the hell?
am i really taken for granted?
should i really believe all his words?

i really put in alot in terms of my actions...
but did he?
seems like he only put in his words without doing it..

just to see him..
i don't mind going all the way to his house almost everyday..
waiting for him for many hours when i don't even know when he will reach or call me..
when i don't even know he appreciate it or its irritating to see me most of the time.

yet i'm blamed at the end for not trusting him & his words.

why so many ups & downs ar?
is the God testing how strong our relationship are?