helpless..

i miss my dear..
i know i'm hopeless ok..
he will be going back his hometown later.

he said he will fetch me from work tml night.
but i know i cant believe everything.
the trust is no longer there.
when can i gain it back?

no matter what he says..
i cant bring myself to trust his words.
trust totally gone.
he shouldnt have lied to me.
he made a big mistake.

i seriously don't know when my trust for him will be back.
as for tml..
whether he will be late or not..
or whatever excuses he's gonna give,
i'll be prepared for it.

somehow..
my heart tells me.
he is not going to be punctual..
or even..
traffic jam.
or some other stuffs like..
he will ask me to go home & wait for him.
whatever..

seriously,
all my confidence gone.
no longer there.

i have nothing for him.
except my love for him.
but i knew its not gonna be enough.

tell me what to do..
i feel so helpless.