heart pieces

my heart feels so empty.
so wanna sms anytime i want..
so wanna call anytime i want..
but i cant.
i cant let myself repeat the old mistake.
all i can say is..
i will wait for the 2 months.
thou i know there isnt a glimpse of hope at all..
but i'm willing to wait.
jun jie made an international call to me ytd..
telling me..

"mei mei, wats meant to be yours will be yours. true love comes with nvr-ending tests. overcome it if u think u are capable..not by ending it when u cant take it at the last moment & telling yourself u're gonna give up cos u're tired. the right way for love to end is the day when both doesnt love each other anymore. if love still exists in both of u..you can move on with your life, but not your heart..it will still remain at the same old place, bleeding & unable to move. in a relationship, u're like going on a roller coaster with ups & downs. nvr-ending tests will always take place till the day u die or the day both partners' love for each other fade. if a person couldnt take tests & go for another r/s...it's like a circle..you will come back to square 1. u will end up having the same problem in the end. u gotta be strong & endure all this. if he ever realise how r/s goes, he may still come back to you."

thanks kor.
i hope i will not let u down.
2 more months..
i will wait.
whether it will work or not..
i have to be prepared.
all i know is that i've tried my best.
thats enough i guess.
i must tell myself that these 2months is to let both of us have a cooling period at a single mode.
its self-consoling..i know.
but now..
this is the only solution i can have for hanging on for 2months.
i will have to go thru this test myself this time..alone with nobody else.

may the god above me bless me to tide over this period.