slacking..

alright.
after my TVB drama..
i'm going to visit my grand-auntie.

after that i will go home to pack my stuffs.
shall wait for baby to fetch me tonight.

till now..
we did not agree at any timing yet.

so..
i shall dilly-dally..

baby's sis called me just now.
but i was at chinatown buying stuffs.
just wished her happie new year..
lolx.
she called me just to ask whether i'm going msia or not..
funny.

i'm so bored..
45mins more to go before my TVB drama starts.
sianx la.

i'm so eager to see baby tonight.
nvm.
i can pack my clothings now.
so later i wun feel lazy to do that.

went to ICA early morning..
so packed sia..
waited more than 2hrs to change my IC..

finally its done.
but later i'll face a bigger problem.
troublesome.
i need to bring my deed poll plus old & new IC along.
cos i haven change my passport yet.
passport need to wait 3days leh.

where got time!
i need 48hrs a day pls..
lolx.

alright.
packing my stuffs now.

byebye.
i shall be back to update if any..
probably on next monday..

1 more day to see my baby..

so tired.
nvr had much sleep these two CNY days.

on mask now.
pimples popping out again.
sianx lah.
i hate it when pimples start poppin durin CNY..

played with my niece, rachel yesterday..
she was so happy.
she is so eager to get hongbaos.
lolx.
tot i will be seeing her today.
but ended up she dint come.
only my younger niece came.

having a tummy ache now..
guess i took too much junk food.

i'll be heading to msia tml with baby.
he'll be coming back to SG to fetch me to his house..
& we will be going to his granny's house on thurs..
cos i dint managed to send my wishes last year.
luckily this year can take leave.
oh well..
next month will be our 2-yr anniversary..
but too bad.
we cant take leave le.
cos got function.
damn.
shiit.
why cant it be on 17 or 19...
nabei*
sianx half liao lor.

wat to do..
i'm stuck in F&B line liao.
maybe celeb it earlier lor..

ok.
i'm gonna watch my tvb drama le.
byebye.

HAPPIE CNY!

eve of CNY

just finish my webcam session with my japanese friend, kosuke kimikawa.
he's so so so fair!
omgness.
but we dint webcam for long.
guess he's busy too.
shall look forward to see him online again.

in less than 30mins..
LUNAR MOOO YEAR is coming..

baby is in msia with friends now..
3 more days to see him.
cos i'll be in msia for 3days to be with him.
going to his ah ma's house.
further down his hometown.
i already decided to sleep throughout..
thats the most ideal way to regain my energy..
most important thing is to waste time.
its damn faraway lor!

hope my baby is enjoying with his friends now..

宝贝。。
我放心了！
我没有乱乱想噢！
我没有不开心。。
我很放心。。
因为我知道我很爱你。。疼你都来不及了。。
所以我清楚知道你是不会让我伤心的。。
对吗？！

我会很耐心地等待初三的来临。。
等你来接我！

宝贝，
新年快乐！
我爱你。。
希望在这新的一年。。
我们的感情会是风调雨顺。。

tired yet happy.

i'm still at work now.
but busy rushing out my schedule.

baby already finish work at 8pm.
he already left to meet his friend elsewhere.

but he will be coming back to fetch me later cos i'm doin closing today.
surprisingly..
he's weirdy.
he says he wanna bring me to MAC for fries.
normally he's so lazy to do it.
something wrong.

or should i say he's becoming better.
i think i better choose to believe that he becoming better.
muackss him.

ok.
shall continue my stuffs le.
will update again for my upcoming plans in CNY.

therefore..
i'm taking this opportunity to wish everyone here..
HAPPY LUNAR YEAR!

happie 1yr 11mths anniversary~

happie 1yr 11mths anniversary!!!
my baby's wearing the shirt that i bought for him.
japan de brand lor!
expensive okiex!
but its so worth it.
looks perfect on him liao.
<33


reach his JB house.


another shot. he still looks rather slpy thou he's not.


slightly better now.
my handsome boy*
i think my baby look rather mature in this long sleeved shirt.








the above pics that we took tgt are freshly snapped into my cam about 1 hr ago before he went home..
specially wanna take pics today de!
cos we dint take any pics for so long.
the next time would be our 2yrs anniversary.

baby..
i love u!

17 Jan09-
finish work bout 4pm.
went home for shower.
pack up.
prepare my stuffs.
waited for baby to fetch me.
den went JB.
slacked @ his house.
cos we watched channel U korean drama.
den headed back to his hometown.
supposed to have BK for late dinner as well as supper de..
but ended up.
i remembered that his housemate mentioned MACdonalds'!
so i suddenly had cravings for MAC fries.
then baby drove to the highway MAC.
so surprised to see the MAC there still selling quarter pounder burger.
SG MAC long long ago during my sec sch times already not available.
also wanna try their MCspicy de..
both i want!
ended up..
baby ate MCspicy..
so i took some.
the MCspicy burger bread is so much different from SG de lors!
quality is so much better.
so much similar to the Subway bread.
but too bad i cant rmb the name of the bread.

my tummy got so bloated manx.
enjoyed the rest of my coke & smoke.
then headed back home.
SLP.
we slept like a dead log again.
like we always did..
haha!

18 Jan09-
woke up @ 9am.
wash up..
went straight down to hair salon..
cos baby already made appointment for me on fri evening at 10am.
was kinda steam-ed during e waiting time.
i mean when i was waiting for my hair to abosrb the color.
did my highlighting & dye.
but not so obvious la.
it can be if i want to..
but i simply don wanna bleach my hair!
never will i allow my hair to be bleached & ended up to be dry!
NEVER manx!

had a quick drink @ his friend cafe.
iced blended choco again.
its my all-time favourites~
their I/B choco is much nicer i should say!
still got plenty of choco chippies!
yummies.

den went back home again.
took shower.
headed back to JB.
met his sis.
have our late late lunch near his sis's place.
almost 6pm++ le..
mongolia spicy ribs rice!
shiok.

sent his sis back..
den went to pelangi mall to buy my stuffs.
end of our fun.

went back SG..
made our way down to VL..
baby bought potato chips for his kitchen ppl.
& me..
i also bought some new year goodies for my staffs as well.

thats it.
baby sent me back home.
we both had a puff..
den he went home.
thats why i'm here updating all my small lil details.



宝贝，
谢谢你从昨晚就一直对我好好！
你已经很久没有这样了！
谢谢你给了我一个开心又难忘的一年十一个月周年纪念日！
我们已经很久没有那么开心也没那么顺利渡过很多的纪念日了。。
因为你。。
我才会过得很开心。
我真的很爱你噢！
你给我的疼爱。。
我一定不会忘记。


这次我能看得出你很用心让我开心。
尽量满足我想要吃的东西。。
也没有让我觉得被遗忘掉的感觉。。
当我在发廊染发时。。
你也没有等不耐烦。。
你却很有耐心地在我的旁边等着我。。陪着我至到我能离开。
我真的很开心。。很开心！

我希望我们的开心时光，所有的快乐不只是在今天或周年纪念日才会发生。。
而是每一天都会过着这样的生活！
但愿如此吧！


甜心。。
我虽然改了名字。。
但我的心一点都没改。。我还是一样地深爱你噢！
从没改过！
我深爱你的心也不会有任何的改变！


我的黄成华，
靓怡永远都爱着你！


祝我们在一起度过一年十一个月的风风雨雨，经过无数的快乐和悲伤。。
一年十一个月周年纪念日~ 快乐*

counting down to 1yr 11mths~

meeting baby soon.
just got back home..

7 hrs more to our 1yr 11mths anniversary.
:)

gotta have my shower now.
1 hr more to see baby..
cos he's finishing work at 6pm..
probably will reach bout 6plus..

going back his hometown later.
not coming back tonight.
tml night will update if there's anythin.
yes*
i'm gonna dye my hair tml!

loves.

1 more to go..

finally..last event of the week.
i'm flat already.
tml gotta wake up at 5am++..
need to reach vl at 7am.
"fantastic" timing!
nowadays ppl like to have events in e morning.
shiit.
i like evening events.
at least no need to wake up before the sun appears..
lolx*

忍忍忍！
just 1 more to go!

will be stayin at baby's house on sat night.
gonna dye my hair on sun..
dying hair tgt with her elder sis most probably..
cos baby already dyed last week.

actually i have a very very bad bad encounter at work today..
"he" insulted me.
not my fault also.
purposely wanna aim at me.
shitt-ie day!
damn.
spoil my whole evening.
raj was also one of the victims.
enuff of that.

shall update tml if there's something for me to say.
fullstop.
nitex.

heartfelt words

people used to say..
"ignorance is bliss"

but sometimes i don agree so.
if its meant for me to know sooner or later..
i would wish it to be now.
if i know e truth much more later..
i will feel worst.
very very worst.

i tried to give in..
as u said if someone who wanna be with u will need to endure all this..
now i am trying so hard to endure.

but i don understand why..
why must u treat me so much different from e others?
i am a human being.
i need someone to be nice to me too.
i need a smile from u too.
& the person is U!

u nvr seems to bother much now.
i knew it.
i can feel it.
don say i'm sensitive.
your attitude & action is the most obvious proof.

not that i'm giving up.
u once told me u will do "it" on 18 feb09.
but my heart already tells me that u will nvr remember it for sure.
seems like even my heart is tellin me not to put in any hope.

我们还有希望吗？
我真的很希望我们会早点开心起来。。

pics uploaded. [latest]

baby & me -xmas staff gathering.


opps. caught in the act wif edna. just another scandal of mine.


dint see her for almost 1 yr..finally met again @ rach darling bday chalet.

something with my thumbdrive..
so dint managed to upload more.

will try again next time.

dint really hang out nowadays..
so not much pics also..

going home soon..
waiting for crowd to settle down.
oh well..
i finally survived for the week..
tml off.
but i know time will pass real fast.

tml got dental appointment @ 12pm.
den shall shop around to see see look look for presents..
1 yr 11 mths anniversary coming..
gonna be 2yrs soon..

quarrel every now & then..
but i nvr realise time passes so fast..
cant imagine that.

ok.
shall stop here now.
byeeee.

low batt -

i cant believe i worked 15hrs non stop on thurs..
i was so deep aslp..
and woke up early again for morning shift work.
haix.
i dono wat to say..
not tat i'm not willing to..
but its seems like every of her full shift..
everytime she falls sick & got mc.
not e first time anyway.
worst thing is..
i am real tired enuff..
working from 7am-10.30pm.
wahs.
shag like no words can describe.
luckily..
that night wasnt so busy.
cos i simply got no more strength.

baby is having supper now.
i cant fall aslp anyway..
so might be waiting for him to reach home den call him to chat awhile.
unless i accidentally fall aslp then too bad.

maybe tml meeting baby..
only maybe..
not sure whether he will be too lazy to come down..
i tink most probably not seeing him tml.
got e strong feeling lahs.
its not e 1st day or month i am tgt with him.

i start to hate e "anony" in my tagboard.
if i really love a guy..
i wouldnt go thru his gf to let him know my feelings.
so stupid i mean.
i rather find ways to contact him & sms him to let him be aware that i love him.
instead of this..
this "anony" in my tag is so irritating this time.
insulted my frens..
& now still lingering around.
baby says just ignore that.
oh well.
i'm so gonna listen to him this time.

well..
this isnt love right.
i think i am starting to build my trust in my baby..
no trust in him means giving myself unhappiness..
causing me to cry & cry..
besides crying & sheding tears..
its still crying & sheding tears.
i am now trying to build as much trust as possible.

CNY is coming..
i haven even shop for any clothes.
might not get also.
cos i'm intending not to take leave during CNY.
e most just take 1 day on e 2nd day of CNY.
see how lahs.
doesnt matter also.
stay home also do nth except watching tv.
might as well work & not waste my 1 day of PH right?

ok.
i am stopping here now.
tml got long day also.
supposed to finish 6pm.
but i have to stay on & meet Angela for her food tasting.
its ok.
just tahan 1 more day den it's finally my OFF day.

next week will be another busy week for events.
i'm starting to get used to closing events myself.
yes.
i told myself once that i need time to adapt.
now i am starting to get the "kick".
more experienced liao!

ok.
i am stopping here now.
neck aching so much.
both arms aching till i cant lift up..
due to thurs event.

so wanna lie on my comfy bed & rest now.
tml working morning shift.

nitex.

思念是一种病

tears flowed again.
dono wats wrong with me again.
am i sensitive again?
freaking hell!
shiit me manx.
dammit*

一辈子有多少的来不及
发现已经失去最重要的东西
恍然大悟。。早已远去。
为何总是在犯错之后。。
才肯相信。。错的是自己。
他们说这就是人生。。
试著体会，试著忍住眼泪。
我还是躲不开应该有的情绪。
我不会奢求世界停止转动。
我知道逃避一点都没有用。
只是这段时间里。。
尤其在夜里。。
还是会想起难忘的事情。
我想我的思念是一种病。。
久久不能痊愈。

i am so lost.
i'm so confused..
whether i'm tired after spring cleaning..
how come my 大小姐脾气 suddenly just come like that!

我一直问自己是否该放手吗。。
我的心很痛。

我很需要田野。。
没有他。。
我早就垮下了。

田野比一个大哥哥，甚至男友还要来的细心。
多希望这种感觉能在我的男友身上得到。。
可惜一直都没有。
我不敢再抱着希望了。
这次肯定没有了。
如果有的话。。
我就不可能现在流着眼泪写着。。。:'(

我的心里已经放弃等你对我的好。

你每次对我的好。。
我都不曾觉得很开心。。
因为我知道我每次的开心都是短暂的。
你每次怪我要求太多。。
但你其实从没了解过我的心。
你已经不再在乎我的感受，心情，我的不开心。

我从来没有觉得那么失败过。。
在这感情。。
我是彻彻底底失败了。
我不懂得要怎么再开心起来！

我好像等你对我的好。。
因为我一直以来都没停止过等待你给我的奇迹。。

但是我却又怕这会是一个空等待。。
我不想你对我的好只是那三分钟的时间。
我不要每次都过着那三分钟热度的痛苦！
你知道我的心真的很难受吗？
你有想过这点吗？

因为我是真的很爱你。。
所以才不要失去你。

宝贝，
但我真的不知道我还能撑多久。。。
你曾答应过要给我快乐。。
你还记得吗？

-.-"

steam-ed.

went ktv ytd..
with baby, pat korkor, rach darling, jer & hua
reach home at bout 3am plus..
bathe..
slept immediately..

baby & me was slping like a dead log.

he was so reluctant to wake up earlier on.
i have to wake him several times..

later have to help him settle his bills..
i forgot bout it too..

his nike slippers are stolen.
i am e one who bought it.
damn the thief!

bought new one last min @ marina square..

ok.
i gotta prepare myself for my cousin's wedding dinner ler!

bye guys.
tml will upload pics :)

rainy day

omgness*
i am so shagged now..
worse than yesterday..
damn..

the worst worst worst thing was..
i still had to see & get all this bad attitude.
wat is this manx!

i am so tried enuff..
yet u are here making me feel even worse.

its raining so heavily..
my mood is so dampened on the 1st day of 2009.

shiit.
tot i was supposed to be energetic..
ended up like this again..

argh..
pls make me happy..
if not i will feel lifeless..
life damn suck at this moment.